Department Store Makeover

So I've been rocking the mismatched makeup to the color of my milky white see through skin for quite some time. Lately I've come into an orange-ish tint that is making me crazy. 

Needless to say, I am some degree of angry every time I look in the mirror and have been wanting to invest in some classy girl makeup for quite some time just wasn't sure where to go or what to get. (decision making is NOT something on my strengths list - clearly)

SOO someone told me I couldn't live without some Estee Lauder Double Wear something or other - so I thought - eh, I can go to Macy's and give it a try. 

I show up at Belk and hover in the area until the Lancome lady comes over. I call myself out publicly because I refuse to take myself too seriously (only in this instance, let's be clear) and she asks if I'm married to the idea of Estee Lauder. I say no - I'm married to not looking like a Walgreens Hooker. 

And there begins my journey...

I'm going to make a long story into a short story and say that Nicolette may have been a guardian angel of some sort. She was hilarious. Let me share some of the random AND inappropriate (for the lady doing your makeup who you've known for 3 seconds) quotes from the evening.

"I told my mama God only gives it to who can handle it and God knoooowws if he made me a size 5 I would tear it upppp girlll"

"I would give slut a wholllee new name if I was a size 5"

"If I had it to do over again I would DEFINITELY be fat but not right now - I'd wait until later in life" 

"I ain't never been a pushy salesman and I ain't gonna start being one today" - this is important because I had asked for advice regarding the 23498 things she put on my face. I wasn't there to spend $1,000 dollars.

Anyways - I'm way happier with my face today - the color is awesome, coverage seems to be holding up and I'm more in tune with the amount of moisturizing and exfoliating I need to do. So now I'll wait until they're offering a free gift before I buy anything else. :)

After that we ate because we were STARVING and then went to Target to get cheaper versions of everything else she used. And wine. 

My purchases - 

The Lancome purchases - 

This was me taking a picture of my eyes with my eyes closed driving to Target so forgive the poor quality. I decided living was more important than getting a clearer picture and then I forgot.

Purple smudgy eye liner and Betty Boop lashes!

Hopefully this ends up working out and I'll finally have a go-to makup that doesn't make me feel like a classless Walgreen's hooker. 

Amen to that!